Alright folks, gather ’round. Had a real kick-in-the-pants lesson last Tuesday that made me dig out my toolbox and rethink everything. Got stranded way out past the old mill when my chain decided it had enough of my nonsense. Just went clunk and gave up. Took me two hours and three awkward phone calls before help showed up. Stood there like a lemon, watching bugs check me out. That’s it. Never again. Rode straight to my shed after rescue and tore that kit apart.
The Great Unpacking Disaster
First thing I did? Dumped the whole damn toolbox upside down on my workbench. Total mess. Picked through the pile, tossing stuff left and right. Found that useless multi-tool gadget I bought off the infomercial. Yeah, the one that promises to fix a submarine? Took me five minutes just to unfold the stupid thing. Straight into the junk drawer with that. Then found some cheapo wrenches – felt like bendy straws in my hand. Snapped one trying to tighten a loose bolt last summer. Trash.
What Actually Saved My Bacon
Sorting through the rubble, only a few things looked like real riders used ’em:
- The Thick Pliers: Not the fancy ones. My old man’s rusty adjustable wrench that bites down HARD. Used it to yank that busted chain link free.
- Real Screwdrivers: Screw those 20-in-1 plastic nightmares. Found two chunky flatheads and a crosshead buried under some rags. Gave them a wipe.
- Tyre Plugger: Third flat tire this month? Saved me twice already. Still sticky from the last patch job. Keep the spare plugs too!
- Big Roll of Tape: Duct tape fixes everything. Taped my mirror back on after a nasty bump. Temporary fix? Try permanent!
- Lights On Sticks: Cheap red ones that clip onto your clothes. Godsend when you’re poking under the bike at dusk.
Building My ‘Never Again’ Kit
Cleared off half the bench. Grabbed a beat-up lunchbox – way tougher than those flimsy fabric pouches. Shoved the five essentials right on top where I can see ’em:
- Thick wrench in first. Makes a loud CLANK.
- Screwdrivers wrapped together with that rubber band from the broccoli bundle. Classy.
- Tyre plug kit tucked in a ziplock bag. Don’t need grit in there.
- Tape roll squashed flat. Half-used is fine.
- Lights checked for batteries. Always dying, so spares duct-taped to the case.
Slapped it under the seat. Rattles like crazy now. Sounds like progress.
Test Run (Almost Didn’t Make It)
Dumb idea time. Went back to the mill spot yesterday. Forgot the bloody chain lube! Heard that awful grinding noise again. Pulled over faster this time. Tore open the lunchbox. Yanked out the wrench and tightened the chain adjuster right there in the dirt. Took maybe five minutes? Chain quieted down. Hands filthy. Victory sticky. Packed up, kicked the stand up, and rode home grinning like a fool.
Lesson hammered in good now. Don’t carry pretty junk. Carry tools that hurt your hand when you grab ’em. That’s what gets you home.
