Okay so today was wild, let me tell you about dealing with Tatum’s mega meltdown and how we finally got peace. Seriously thought I was gonna lose it.
Right after lunch, Tatum was chilling one second, then BAM! Full-on waterworks. Like, screaming, face all red, big fat tears rolling down. No obvious reason. Thought maybe tummy ache? Diaper check – clean as a whistle. Tried feeding – he turned his head away like I offered broccoli.
Stage 1: Trying the Usual Stuff (Spoiler: Epic Fail)
My brain went straight to the “baby comfort checklist”. First, picked him up, snuggle mode activated. Rocked him gently, walked around the room… nada. The crying just got LOUDER. Switched to the “shush-pat” – you know, loud shushing sound while patting his back. Felt like I was trying to calm a tiny hurricane. My arms were killing me and my shushing game was weak. Total fail.
Panic started setting in. Threw caution to the wind and tried:
- The Singing: My off-key rendition of “Twinkle Twinkle”? Made him cry harder. Ouch.
- The Dancing: Weird bouncing around the kitchen? Not a fan.
- The Toy Distraction: Shiny rattle? Got swatted away like a fly.
- The Outside Reset: Scooped him up, bolted for the backyard. Fresh air? Sunshine? He looked at a squirrel then just cried MORE.
Completely baffled. Sat down on the sofa with him, totally lost. Thought, “Okay, maybe he’s just… overstimulated? Or exhausted?” But his nap wasn’t that far off.
Stage 2: The Accidental Discovery
Felt drained. Literally flopped back on the sofa cushions with him on my chest. I just breathed, slow and deep, barely moving. My head bumped the back cushion and knocked the air conditioner vent open above the sofa. Cool air whooshed out with this really loud, steady WHIRRRRR sound.
Tatum flinched for a second… stopped mid-scream… listened… then his crying just dropped to whimpers. Like magic!
I froze. Didn’t dare move. Just kept holding him, letting that loud AC noise wash over us. After like a solid minute? Silence. Beautiful, stunned silence. He shifted his head, snuggled deeper into my neck, eyes heavy.
Huh? So it’s white noise?! But LOUD?
Stage 3: Figuring Out What Actually Worked
Carefully, SO carefully, stood up and carried him to his nursery. Crib time. Quick diaper change – he fussed a little. Ugh, here we go again. Remembered the AC noise. I actually have this tiny old fan buried in the closet for emergencies.
Grabbed it. Set it up on the dresser, plugged it in, and pointed it AWAY from the crib towards the wall. Turned it on full blast. The sound wasn’t soothing low hum, it was seriously loud air whooshing and humming – kinda grating actually. Way louder than those fancy white noise machines.
Placed him down. Braced for impact.
He lay there, blinked a few times, listening to the roaring fan… then his eyelids started drooping. Within maybe 3 minutes? Out like a light. Snoring softly. Victory!
Learned my lesson: Forget gentle shushing. Forget quiet babbling brook sounds. Tatum apparently needs industrial-grade, drown-out-your-thoughts level loud mechanical fan noise to switch off the tears and knock himself out. Who knew?
PS: This totally reminded me of when I quit my last job. Boss kept offering quiet “relaxation rooms”. Nope. Needed the chaos of hitting the road instead. Sometimes the fix is weird and loud. Found an old photo digging the fan out – was wearing the exact same sweatpants I got yelled at for at work. Funny how things loop back.
